Ask the Coach: Where are all the spiritual guys?

Ask the Coach: Where are all the spiritual guys?

Ask the Coach Spiritual Laws

Dear Coach Linda,
I’ve been doing personal and spiritual growth work for really long time. I am passionate about self-awareness and evolution and I’ve taken every workshop and read every book there is about love and relationships. I have a lot of friends and a career I like. But everywhere I look I find rude men who have done no inner work. I’m frustrated that, after so much looking, I still can’t find the one for me. I feel left out of an important part of life and now, I feel there is little hope of finding anyone to share my life with. I’m afraid of being alone forever. What should I do?
~ Christie

Buddha-with-Heart

“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”

Christie, I congratulate you for pursuing a path of personal and spiritual growth. I feel your passion regarding self-awareness and your evolutionary journey.

It does seem like a paradox: you work diligently on “self-actualization”, to come to a sense of inner peace and harmony … and then look around to find not many other people have done the same. I read the other day that on average, more women tend to have a heightened relational and emotional maturity level that serves as an advantageous gateway to higher consciousness. (This doesn’t mean that all men don’t have emotional maturity – I know many who do.) I also read that women also tend to have more synapses linking to Continue reading

Let’s Bust the Valentine’s Day Blues

Attitudes Courage Dating Dreams Fulfillment Planning Self Discovery Self Esteem Solutions

Back in the day when I was a relationship train-wreck, before I started to get my sh*t together about my self-esteem and intimacy issues, I used to despise Valentine’s Day, and all its reminders about romance and being in love and all those ads where pretty gals were surprised and delighted to be presented beautiful diamond engagement rings by handsome dudes. I used to hang black crepe paper ribbons in my work cubicle, wear all black, and regard the day as a day of mourning. I used to range emotionally from seething to despair around this time of year. I know I am (was) not alone – I talk to many singles now who regard Valentine’s Day as an unwelcome reminder of their “alone-ness” and longing for a loving connection. Continue reading

“Survey Says!”…dating & relationship statistics

Attitudes Dating Dating Skills Fulfillment Goals Planning Relationships Solutions Women

Because I am a research geek (I love surveys and statistics), I was cruising around the interwebs, looking to see if I could find any recent stats on Singles in the U.S. I found a site that I’ve now bookmarked, statisticbrain.com, just in case I have the urge to know more about how many people visit national parks and things like that. They did have a pretty cool table that highlighted findings from a survey chronicled in a book called Sex in America, A Definitive Survey. As you can surmise, researchers like clarity, even in their book titles. I’m summarizing the stats that I found super-interesting here – some of which I think you should consider as you map out your scouting strategies – and of course, Continue reading

What are men looking for in a relationship?

Relationships Solutions Success Uncategorized

I’ve lately been talking with some women who are in a whirl over “how to understand men.” Some of them don verbal grenade launchers when they start talking about guys, while others wring their hands, urgently and anxiously trying to figure out the Masculine Mysteries.

When I’m coaching people, I generally redirect my clients’ attention back to themselves because I find that fulfillment is not about changing other people’s behaviors to suit us, or trying to figure out what motivates others. In my experience, fulfillment is about discovering Continue reading

How ready are you for change?

Attitudes Courage Creativity Dreams Fulfillment Goals Homework Planning Prosperity Self Discovery Self Esteem Solutions Success

Do you believe in your life vision enough to “go for it”, to take up that vision with both hands? All creative ventures, including the forging of our ideal life, begin a little at a time, where an idea may lead to another, snowballing and gaining momentum. But the creation of our vision has to start somewhere – we need to move beyond the sanctuary of our proverbial caves, the place where we may be safe and warm but yet stagnant. Our caves might be the debilitating self-doubts and behaviors that, while creating an illusion of Continue reading

10 Commandments of Attracting Extraordinary Relationships

Attitudes Dating Dating Skills Dreams Fulfillment Relationships Requirements Self Discovery Success
Just say no to "meh"

Just say no to “meh”

Interested in attracting the extraordinary? Not satisfied with “meh” (or worse, destructive) relationships? Congratulations – and welcome to Empowered Dating & Relationships, a new paradigm. I do not believe – not for one second – that we need to settle for anything less than the very best in our lives. I think that men and women alike can come together from this space of empowerment and vitality and learn to co-create relationships that are uplifting, exciting and Continue reading

Ladies, it is time to call out the power

Attitudes Courage Dating Freedom Fulfillment Relationships Self Discovery Self-Acceptance Success
wonder-woman

What would Wonder Woman post on Facebook?

As I scan all of the status posts on my Facebook page, I see so many women posting articles about men. Here’s a sampling of what I’ve seen over the weekend:  Seven types of men who will never marry. Nine types of women that men do not want to marry. Why women fall for bad boys. 10 ways to know you’re dating a real man. Creativity, madness and drugs. Does your dog love you back? Oh wait – sorry –  those two are my own. … Let’s move back to the topic, shall we? Continue reading

What are your top 6 requirements in a relationship?

Dating Dating Skills Goals Relationships Requirements Self Discovery

They might not be what you think.

Couple in fieldMany relationships fail because, despite the initial intense chemistry and attraction, the couple is just not compatible. As they get to know each other more intimately, they realize they have different values, life goals, and relationship criteria. For partners to be compatible, they MUST BOTH have similar values and goals and have their relationship criteria met.

I know that for me, identifying my relationship requirements was Continue reading

Develop a Positive Mindset Pt. 2 – the influence of negativity

Attitudes Dating Dating Skills Fulfillment Relationships Spiritual Laws

Negativity Is a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

People with a pessimistic or negative worldview take a victim stance, seeing life as a continuous succession of problems and a process of unfairness and oppression. They can’t move forward, don’t expect a lot and don’t get much. When things go wrong, they shrug their shoulders and passively accept that this is the way life is and there isn’t anything they can do to make it better. Does any of that sound familiar to you? This is the land of “victim-hood”. Continue reading

Dating Gold Digging Women? What it says about your values (part 2)

Ask the Coach Dating Dating Skills Finances Relationships Solutions Spiritual Laws

In my last post, I started to address a rich question (in truth: a complaint) that I received via my “Ask the Coach” program. This particular entry was so rich that I wanted to break it down – my first response addressed the issue of honoring our time, since spending 7 months with someone who doesn’t reflect one of our core values is … well … kind of a waste of time.  Here’s the question/complaint again, to refresh our memories: Continue reading