Life doesn’t happen by osmosis

Dreams Goals Planning Success

… Don’t let your regrets outnumber your dreams

I had the pleasure of attending a “women in business” networking event yesterday (on a Saturday – at 8:30 in the morning – in the middle of winter – with an hour drive to the venue – I might add just so you can gauge the level of my commitment to this group) during which one of the panelists stated: “Life doesn’t happen by osmosis”. A little while later, another panelist said: “You don’t age until your regrets outnumber your dreams”. These quotes struck a chord with me and got me to thinking about the change process, since at the core, my role as a coach is to be a change agent, a role filled with paradoxes and irony. Ironic because most people want to improve their lives in some way (make more money, get a better job, lose weight, find and keep true love) – yet at the very same time, most are deathly afraid of making the needed changes to achieve what Continue reading

How to be successful in everything you do

Attitudes Courage Dreams Fulfillment Goals

 – including in your relationships

Over the course of my career, as a life coach and in the world of advertising, I’ve been fortunate to learn from people amazingly successful, and wise, in both the realm of their professions and in their personal lives. (Note: I define “success” here as achieving what matters most to you – not as some objective measure of outer wealth, accomplishment or achievement.) Observing people who are living fully on their terms and loving it, I’ve seen how they think, react, interrelate, and problem solve.  I’ve applied these lessons to my own life, and to those I coach.

I’ve seen these people not only engage continuously in life-supporting (and generous) behaviors, but also avoid certain negative actions and mindsets that other, less successful people habitually get lost in. Here’s an overview of 8 limiting beliefs and behaviors these people avoid: Continue reading

“Survey Says!”…dating & relationship statistics

Attitudes Dating Dating Skills Fulfillment Goals Planning Relationships Solutions Women

Because I am a research geek (I love surveys and statistics), I was cruising around the interwebs, looking to see if I could find any recent stats on Singles in the U.S. I found a site that I’ve now bookmarked, statisticbrain.com, just in case I have the urge to know more about how many people visit national parks and things like that. They did have a pretty cool table that highlighted findings from a survey chronicled in a book called Sex in America, A Definitive Survey. As you can surmise, researchers like clarity, even in their book titles. I’m summarizing the stats that I found super-interesting here – some of which I think you should consider as you map out your scouting strategies – and of course, Continue reading

New Year’s Resolutions: Stretching for the stars

Courage Creativity Dreams Fulfillment Goals Homework Planning Resolutions Solutions Success

True confidence can only be found if we put our creative vision for our life to the test, and stretch our selves to the utmost.  – 3 of Wands

What you are is what you have been, what you will be is what you do now. – Buddha

If you’re like me, the New Year always brings with it an element of nostalgia – or better yet, regret – because I realize that I didn’t quite accomplish what I said I was going to do. When you look back at 2013, what are the things that you most regret NOT doing? In the early months of 2014, are you on track to NOT DOING them again? Rather than beat myself up, however, I look at January as an ideal opportunity to transform regrets into opportunities, or goals, for this coming year. And then, because I like to focus on the extraordinary, think about how these goals can S*T*R*E*T*C*H. I love stretch goals because they challenge us to break out of the routine. Are you ready to stretch your goals and give yourself a good mental/emotional workout? Continue reading

New Year’s Resolutions: Don’t dream it, be it

Dating Dreams Fulfillment Goals Homework Planning Relationships Resolutions Solutions Success

Don't wish for a great new yearIt’s a new year, another fresh start, another opportunity to dust off our dreams and desires and try them on again, in the hopes of attaining them. I’ve blogged about New Year’s resolutions before, (here and here) focusing on identifying the subconscious beliefs and behaviors prevent us from achieving our goals. What’s interesting to me is that, in my Continue reading

It’s time to attract the extraordinary!

Dating Skills Dreams Fulfillment Goals Planning Relationships Resolutions Special Events Success

Let’s Make 2014 the Year that You Attract the Extraordinary! Do you want to see all of your New Year’s resolutions come true? Do you want to attract an extraordinary relationship, or make current relationship gleam? Now’s the time get this party started! Let’s shut the door on 2013 and open a new one, to a life that sparkles with good friends, healthy finances and a thriving career – and most of all, let this be the year that you find Continue reading

How ready are you for change?

Attitudes Courage Creativity Dreams Fulfillment Goals Homework Planning Prosperity Self Discovery Self Esteem Solutions Success

Do you believe in your life vision enough to “go for it”, to take up that vision with both hands? All creative ventures, including the forging of our ideal life, begin a little at a time, where an idea may lead to another, snowballing and gaining momentum. But the creation of our vision has to start somewhere – we need to move beyond the sanctuary of our proverbial caves, the place where we may be safe and warm but yet stagnant. Our caves might be the debilitating self-doubts and behaviors that, while creating an illusion of Continue reading

Is your current relationship the right one for you?

Attitudes Dating Dating Skills Fulfillment Requirements Solutions Success

From The Chooser files, an assessment

The other night I hosted a webinar on Being the Chooser – a new paradigm for attracting the extraordinary.

(FYI: I also use the words Creator and Architect interchangeably for the word Chooser – it all refers to the same thing: taking the initiative to create what you want, taking full responsibility for your outcomes and making choices mindful of their long-term consequences…. In other words, think about what you want for yourself in your life. A fulfilling relationship? Success in your career? Financial serenity? Whatever your aims are, to get what you want, you must be the Chooser.)

Continue reading

Ask the Coach: What’s the magic formula for true love?

Ask the Coach: What’s the magic formula for true love?

Ask the Coach Dating Skills Dreams Fulfillment Relationships Solutions

Dear Coach Linda: I am so so soooo tired of being single. I went through a bitter divorce about 10 years ago and just cannot find someone I want to be with. Can you please tell me – what is the formula for making the magic happen?
Sincerely,
Mary A.

Hi Mary: I hear your longing to share your life with an extraordinary partner and I applaud your ability to make your goal clear. Without clarity of intention, there is only aimlessness. But I’m also noticing your statement about how tired you are – Continue reading

Ask The Coach pt 3: How to be approachable

Ask The Coach pt 3: How to be approachable

Ask the Coach Dating Skills Fulfillment Self Esteem Self-Acceptance

What’s a single woman to do?

You want to remain open and be approachable yet you can’t help but put walls up.

I had a client, I’ll dub Mary out of respect for privacy, reach out to me to ask that question. “I want to be in a relationship, but every time a guy talks to me, no matter what he says, I get defensive.”

Man, can I relate. I remember there was a period where I wanted to fling daggers at any guy who tried to “chat me up”. Not exactly the right kind of attitude for me to adopt, given the fact that I wanted to find a romantic partner.

With this in mind, we set about coaching her through this feeling. After exploring with her for a while, it became apparent that she had trouble trusting, and was Continue reading