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Or, to paraphrase Sally Field: “I like me! Right now, I like me!”
Anyone who reads my blog posts, or sits in on my webinars, consistently hears me say: Know Thyself … and … Be Your True Self (<– 5 Essential Principles for Dating Bliss). The underlying thread here is that knowing yourself leads to self-acceptance, and when you accept yourself, you can be true to yourself, and not sacrifice yourself on the altar of desperation and self-loathing. (How’s that for drama?) You’ll make much better choices if you have healthy self-regard. This seems to be a “DUH!” statement but boy oh boy, our world is chock full of people who berate themselves, who are unaware of their sabotaging beliefs, and thus deny themselves their full potential. In other words, This Is A Biggie. There is no true success (however you define it) in your life without self-esteem.
How healthy is your self-respect? Take this quick assessment to find out … and if your self-esteem needs a little polishing up, scroll down to find out how you can start working on it right now.
Answer these questions below with a Yes or No. Be honest–and if you’re not sure, ask a close, supportive friend or family member for their observations. Are you:
- Assertive in expressing your needs and opinions?
- Confident in your ability to make decisions?
- More likely to focus on your perceived strengths, talents and assets?
- Able to accept compliments and positive feedback?
- Able to push through fears of failure or rejection?
- Able to form secure and honest relationships — and permanently leave unhealthy ones?
- Realistic (with a sprinkling of optimism) in your expectations?
- Less likely to be critical and judgmental of yourself and others?
- More resilient and better able to weather stress and setbacks?
- Less likely to experience feelings such as hopelessness, worthlessness, guilt and shame?
- Less likely to suffer from eating disorders, addictions, depression or anxiety?
If the majority of your answers are no, chances are you suffer from low self-esteem.
Dismayed with your results?
Here are some quick tips for you, to help you power yourself up:
- Become aware of how you feel about yourself. Are you constantly bashing yourself? Do you constantly prevent yourself from “going for it” because you don’t think you’re good enough/smart enough/attractive enough etc. etc? The only way to release yourself from the bondage of these self-sabotaging beliefs is to become totally aware that you are carrying them around. You’ll probably need to start doing the inner work….
- Know thyself – and love thyself. Yes! I said it again! I am a broken record! Recognize and embrace your positive qualities. Recognize and accept your limitations with loving kindness. These are the keys to abolishing self-degradation.
- Learn to trust yourself. Remind yourself of all the problems you have faced and tackled. You conquered challenges – and can do it again!
- Identify what you love about your character and personality —personal qualities within yourself that you already possess—and affirm them.
Granted, these solutions are just bullet-point goals and are devoid of the tools, techniques and practices to help you actually achieve them. Improving self-esteem requires time and continual practice – I’m not talking about epiphanies that flash and are as quickly forgotten.
Fortunately there are ways to put these strategies into play, which we fully explore in my coaching programs. In fact, the majority of my work with my clients centers around managing their inner critics because it’s pointless to identify goals and strategies if you truly do not believe that you can achieve. And I know this from experience – my own life coach really helped catapult me on my self-esteem healing journey.
Try working with a coach – a good therapist can help, too – or perhaps you have a trusted priest/pastor/reverend/priestess/shaman/healer/intuitive that can help you. The key is to seek the help of an objective party who’s only outcome attachment is your well being.
Ready to make that step toward knowing and liking yourself? Ready to boost your self-esteem for the long-term, I invite you to get in touch by emailing me here for a complimentary “Find Your Happily Ever After” strategy session. I guarantee that you will permanently change the way you look at your life. To further explore Self-Esteem, I will soon be hosting a webinar on Being A Successful Single (which involves a lot of knowing and accepting thyself.) Stay Tuned For More Details.