“Survey Says!”…dating & relationship statistics

Attitudes Dating Dating Skills Fulfillment Goals Planning Relationships Solutions Women

Because I am a research geek (I love surveys and statistics), I was cruising around the interwebs, looking to see if I could find any recent stats on Singles in the U.S. I found a site that I’ve now bookmarked, statisticbrain.com, just in case I have the urge to know more about how many people visit national parks and things like that. They did have a pretty cool table that highlighted findings from a survey chronicled in a book called Sex in America, A Definitive Survey. As you can surmise, researchers like clarity, even in their book titles. I’m summarizing the stats that I found super-interesting here – some of which I think you should consider as you map out your scouting strategies – and of course, Continue reading

New Year’s Resolutions: Stretching for the stars

Courage Creativity Dreams Fulfillment Goals Homework Planning Resolutions Solutions Success

True confidence can only be found if we put our creative vision for our life to the test, and stretch our selves to the utmost.  – 3 of Wands

What you are is what you have been, what you will be is what you do now. – Buddha

If you’re like me, the New Year always brings with it an element of nostalgia – or better yet, regret – because I realize that I didn’t quite accomplish what I said I was going to do. When you look back at 2013, what are the things that you most regret NOT doing? In the early months of 2014, are you on track to NOT DOING them again? Rather than beat myself up, however, I look at January as an ideal opportunity to transform regrets into opportunities, or goals, for this coming year. And then, because I like to focus on the extraordinary, think about how these goals can S*T*R*E*T*C*H. I love stretch goals because they challenge us to break out of the routine. Are you ready to stretch your goals and give yourself a good mental/emotional workout? Continue reading

New Year’s Resolutions: Don’t dream it, be it

Dating Dreams Fulfillment Goals Homework Planning Relationships Resolutions Solutions Success

Don't wish for a great new yearIt’s a new year, another fresh start, another opportunity to dust off our dreams and desires and try them on again, in the hopes of attaining them. I’ve blogged about New Year’s resolutions before, (here and here) focusing on identifying the subconscious beliefs and behaviors prevent us from achieving our goals. What’s interesting to me is that, in my Continue reading

What are men looking for in a relationship?

Relationships Solutions Success Uncategorized

I’ve lately been talking with some women who are in a whirl over “how to understand men.” Some of them don verbal grenade launchers when they start talking about guys, while others wring their hands, urgently and anxiously trying to figure out the Masculine Mysteries.

When I’m coaching people, I generally redirect my clients’ attention back to themselves because I find that fulfillment is not about changing other people’s behaviors to suit us, or trying to figure out what motivates others. In my experience, fulfillment is about discovering Continue reading

How ready are you for change?

Attitudes Courage Creativity Dreams Fulfillment Goals Homework Planning Prosperity Self Discovery Self Esteem Solutions Success

Do you believe in your life vision enough to “go for it”, to take up that vision with both hands? All creative ventures, including the forging of our ideal life, begin a little at a time, where an idea may lead to another, snowballing and gaining momentum. But the creation of our vision has to start somewhere – we need to move beyond the sanctuary of our proverbial caves, the place where we may be safe and warm but yet stagnant. Our caves might be the debilitating self-doubts and behaviors that, while creating an illusion of Continue reading

Is your current relationship the right one for you?

Attitudes Dating Dating Skills Fulfillment Requirements Solutions Success

From The Chooser files, an assessment

The other night I hosted a webinar on Being the Chooser – a new paradigm for attracting the extraordinary.

(FYI: I also use the words Creator and Architect interchangeably for the word Chooser – it all refers to the same thing: taking the initiative to create what you want, taking full responsibility for your outcomes and making choices mindful of their long-term consequences…. In other words, think about what you want for yourself in your life. A fulfilling relationship? Success in your career? Financial serenity? Whatever your aims are, to get what you want, you must be the Chooser.)

Continue reading

Are you caught in a trap?

Dating Dating Skills Relationships Solutions Success Uncategorized

Register for all the major online dating sites – Check.
Go to singles mixers – Check.
Ask friends to help scout – Check.
Go out on a bunch of dates and come home frustrated and dismayed – Check.

What exactly is going wrong? If you’re like me, it could very well be that you’ve fallen into one of these common dating traps. Continue reading

Does the Thought of Speed Dating Fill You with Anxiety, Panic, Confusion?

Courage Dating Skills Dreams Fulfillment Planning Relationships Requirements Solutions Success

New Tips to Prepare You for Fun and Enjoyment Instead

speed dating coupleI’m creating a Speed Dating event (not your run of the mill Speed Dating event, mind you), with my friend, Cassie, of Cassie’s Calendar and the key organizer of the Single and Looking in NJ meet up group and I have been thinking about the feedback I’ve been getting from friends and clients about the viability of such events.

In my heart of hearts, I believe in the power of speed dating events. We are all active professionals, busy with our kick-a$$ careers and our families, sometimes with Continue reading

Ask the Coach: What’s the magic formula for true love?

Ask the Coach: What’s the magic formula for true love?

Ask the Coach Dating Skills Dreams Fulfillment Relationships Solutions

Dear Coach Linda: I am so so soooo tired of being single. I went through a bitter divorce about 10 years ago and just cannot find someone I want to be with. Can you please tell me – what is the formula for making the magic happen?
Sincerely,
Mary A.

Hi Mary: I hear your longing to share your life with an extraordinary partner and I applaud your ability to make your goal clear. Without clarity of intention, there is only aimlessness. But I’m also noticing your statement about how tired you are – Continue reading

How susceptible are you to Negging?

Dating Dating Skills Relationships Self Esteem Solutions Uncategorized

Or, the perils of low self-esteem and dating.

To love thyself is the beginningFound some research the other day, courtesy of Psychology Today, about the effects insults have on attracting partners – as illustrated via a technique known as “negging”* in the Pick Up artist world. Apparently, lowering someone’s self-esteem does indeed make him or her more compliant and more inclined to accept romantic advances. Take a look at the study results: Continue reading